Saturday, March 23, 2013

Teryn's Confession - Why Did She Do It?

This is going to be a small take on why I believe Teryn decided (unbeknownst to us) to make her "big" confession on Epsiode 2. 

I will tell you that she's been flooded with positive affirmations about her courage in sharing her "secret" to her family and the world.  I want to personally say thank you to those of you who've been so supportive of my daughter.  I am incredibly proud of the courage it took for Teryn to share her secret with us.  For those of you who haven't been as supportive and have gone so far to take the time to criticize her for that decision? Well, as her mother, I'd like to let you have it, but as a woman trying my best to bless and not curse my enemies, (taking baby steps by the way), I will just say, God bless you!

Of course, there will ALWAYS be critics (do you have nothing better to do than tear others down?), just as there will ALWAYS be those who bless us (thank you for the encouragement)!

Here are just a couple of the most asked about questions that I've heard since Episode 2 aired.

I'll try my best to answer them.

"Why would she tell you?" - As you may or may not know, the "sex talk" message that I gave in Episode 1 is actually called, "Real Love Waits, I don't Until I Do".  You only heard a minute of a 45 minute message.  I've spoken in front of tens of thousands of teenagers across the country sharing this message. While encouraging kids to live a life of purity, I've frequently used my oldest daughter, Teryn, who told me she'd made the decision to remain a virgin until her wedding night, as an example.  Many times during my seminars, Teryn has been in the audience and I've even introduced her to everyone!  She told me it killed her each time because she knew it wasn't true.  This is why she felt it was time to tell us the truth.  I am so proud of her and think she's one of the bravest women I know.  The guilt and shame she must have felt all these years from not just myself and her dad Nikita, but the church (not biblical, by the way) must have been horrible.  I couldn't be more proud of Teryn and the guts it took for her to do this.  She went to the producers and told them what she was going to do.   We knew nothing about it.  I saw a comment where someone thought it was "set up" because the cameras was on mine and Kolby's faces immediately following her confession.  This is not true.  It was not set up!  The only ones who knew what was coming were the producers and Tawni.  Teryn had confided in her just days earlier and Tawni was a huge source of support for her.  Kolby, Kendra and I had no idea.  Yes, the producers were "camera ready", only because they wanted to capture the moment.  Personally, I'm glad they did.  God's love is unconditional and so is mine for my daughters.

She's 30 and married, why would she think it's any of your business?  - This is absolutely true.  It isn't any of our business.  What each of us choose to do throughout our lifetime, good or bad, is between us and God.  I don't expect after only 2 episodes that you could possibly understand how close our family is.  I feel confident to say that Teryn knew after the initial shock we may have felt when she told us that she would have what she needed the most, our undying love and support, along with NO judgement or condemnation whatsoever.  That's exactly what she got.  She knew she would receive that because she's experienced the unconditional love of her family all of her life.  Please understand that we weren't shocked because we thought less of her,  we were shocked because she'd always declared proudly that she was a virgin on her wedding night and now, all these years later, she was telling us something else.  That's it. 

Jesus doesn't want us to carry our burdens alone.  Unfortunately in the church, this is what so many do because they can't trust the gossips in the church (a word from the Lord for you gossips..SHUT UP!).  It's tragic that some churches shoot their wounded, rather than restore them to the Father.  This should not be.  For fear of being exposed for our struggles, we tend to keep them inside and allow sin, guilt, shame or condemnation to eat at us.  I'm not saying everyone should air their "dirty laundry" to the church or the world.  But, you can air your "dirty laundry" to the Lord.    That's why His word says, "cast all your anxiety upon Him, because He cares for you" - 1st Peter 5:7 and in Matthew 11:28, "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."  If you're struggling with anything in your life, I encourage you to search the Scriptures.  The answer is there for everything.  And I mean everything. 

Too many times throughout my life, I've failed God miserably.  However, I'm so grateful that no matter the sins of my past (or yours for that matter), He's a forgiving God and loves us in spite of our shortcomings.  We may not all abide by His ways like we should, but there's no denying His ways are the best.  Period.
Some of the comments that I have found to be the most disheartening about this episode are "how stupid that you guys were all crying" or "what is the big deal, nobody waits anymore!".

We have become a society that expect so much less from our young people or eachother.  And if that's what we continue to do, that's exactly what we're going to get.

Preacher's Daughters airs on Lifetime every Tuesday at 10/9c.  Hope you'll keep watching!

No comments: